MY THOUGHTS ON SOME MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT RELATIONSHIP AND MARRIAGE – 2

Few days ago, I saw a Facebook post where a woman wrote that women should stop pretending, that the grandmother of Jesus married the biggest boy in town. She wrote that Ruth and her mother in law plotted the graph and snared the most eligible bachelor in town. She also wrote that Ruth made the moves, and strategically placed herself where she would be seen by a big boy. She said Ruth wanted Boaz as a husband and went for him and played her cards right by forming pristine maid. She said Ruth knew she wanted the most eligible bachelor in town and the biggest shot in town, and if she didn’t strategize, she wouldn’t be the grandmother of Jesus.

Another woman commented that the Bible is not complete, and that Bathseba purposely went to bath when her husband had already told her King David would not be going to war; and that she read somewhere that Bathseba knows her tricks well. She further added that it’s not actually in the Bible but she has read some biography of Bathseba, who was into the game well and that was how Uriah married her. She said Solomon wouldn’t have been king if not for Bathseba’s sharpness and she knew how to handle David in sex matters.

First of all, I don’t know about the Bible these women use but my own Bible is complete. It’s true that not everything is recorded in the Bible but the Bible is not incomplete. The Bible is complete.

  1. It is not everything you read that you must believe. We must use wisdom and discernment when reading books even if it is a Spiritual book. Many writings and teachings have misled people.
  2. The Book of Ruth has been greatly misinterpreted to suit people’s selfish desires. When interpreting Scriptures, we should consider the historical and cultural background in which it was written.

The main theme of the Book of Ruth is salvation: where Ruth a foreigner turned to Israel’s God, and so became a part of God’s faithful people and received blessings.

Marriage is another theme in the Book of Ruth. Boaz, as a close relative to Ruth was responsible for taking care of her. Ruth was showing great family loyalty by going to meet him instead of going to look for a young man, either rich or poor. Even though Ruth went to meet Boaz, Boaz knew the right thing to do and how to go about it. He knew he was a close relative and responsible for her, but he also knew there was a man who was a closer relative than he was. He first of all gave this closer relative an opportunity to be responsible for Ruth. He followed their cultural beliefs and got Ruth the right way.

Our cultural beliefs change with time and you must consider that when interpreting and applying Scriptures. Don’t interpret Scriptures to suit your selfish motives and desires.

  1. If you study the Book of Ruth, you’ll find out that in Chapter 2, Ruth went out to work in the fields but she didn’t intentionally go to Boaz’ field. It was a coincidence that she found herself in the field of Boaz, who was also a relative to Naomi and a rich and influential man who belonged to the family of Naomi’s husband Elimelech. Ruth’s main purpose for going to the field was to work and she didn’t purposely go to Boaz’ field.

Before you interpret any Scripture, try to read previous Chapters and study it with an open mind not attaching what you feel is the right interpretation and application.

  1. Relationships and marriage is not a game. It is not about who can play his/her cards well or who can plot the best graph or who can make the best moves or who has the best strategy or who knows the best tricks. It is not a game of winning and losing.

But if you want to turn your own relationship and marriage to a game, then you should be ready to play the game for the rest of your life. If you use tricks, or play cards and use strategies to get a man to marry you, you should be ready to continue to use these things to keep him and it’s definitely not worth it. There’s more to marriage and relationship than spending your time plotting graphs and looking for new tricks and new moves and strategies.

  1. You can use your games and strategies to get the ‘most eligible bachelor’ in town or the biggest boy in town or the best shot in town or whatever title you want to give it. But you cannot use games, tricks and strategies to get a godly man.

It’s up to you to make a choice.

I’ll conclude with a few words for the men taken from Proverbs 7:6-27. I’ll only highlight some verses; you can read the whole text by yourself.

“Listen to me, young men, and not only listen but obey; don’t let your desires get out of hand; don’t let yourself think about her. Don’t go near her; stay away from where she walks, lest she tempt you and seduce you. For she has been the ruin of multitudes—a vast host of men have been her victims. If you want to find the road to hell, look for her house.” Proverbs 7:24-27 (TLB)

Who is this woman that is being referred to?

Proverbs 7:10-12 says,

“She approached him, saucy and pert, and dressed seductively. She was the brash, coarse type, seen often in the streets and markets, soliciting at every corner for men to be her lovers.” (TLB)

“She was dressed fancy like a woman of the street with only one thing in mind. She was one of those women who are loud and restless and never stay at home, who walk street after street, waiting to trap a man.” (CEV)

“Suddenly, there she was in front of him, dressed like a prostitute. She had plans for him. She was a wild and rebellious woman who would not stay at home. She walked the streets, always looking for someone to trap.” (ERV)

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